Somebody Else

Trigger warning: disordered eating, restriction and emotional abuse * * * First of all, and potentially last of all, she's prettier than me. There was a sinking feeling of sorts, when I happened across her page. Ah, I see it. I see what he sees in her. Because she's prettier than me. Prettier than me, … Continue reading Somebody Else

Today Was…

Today was...dragging my feet at work. My sleep has been poor this past week and a lot of the tasks at the pharmacy are pretty tedious at the moment so there was a lot of checking my phone, getting distracted and feeling guilty because of it. Today was...something he'd said replaying in my head over … Continue reading Today Was…

Desire Is Not Respect: Attraction + Trauma Bonding

Something that's changed for me significantly in the past few years is the way I approach attraction and romantic interest. This is quite encouraging for me because experiencing frequent bouts of depression sometimes makes me feel that everything is stagnant and that there's no point to anything; so it's really nice to feel like despite … Continue reading Desire Is Not Respect: Attraction + Trauma Bonding

A Visit Home, Emotional Separation + Maintaining Boundaries

This time last week, I was back in Shetland for the first time in 1½ years. Prior to this, I'd found myself growing unusually homesick. Seeing people on social media doing the regular, banal things like frequenting the dingy local bars and taking coastal walks was sending pangs of nostalgia through me. So I figured … Continue reading A Visit Home, Emotional Separation + Maintaining Boundaries