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SMUT. and Self-Esteem

Examining the link between self-esteem and creativity

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Tag: therapy

First Week On Sertraline

October 20, 20201 Comment

I've written fairly extensively about my qualms about anti-depressive treatment. I won't go into depth now but I've written about it here and here. Not so long ago, I was feeling particularly resistant about taking them; maybe partly because my depressive illness had gotten so bad that I knew I might have to. But for … Continue reading First Week On Sertraline

The Problem With “Getting Better”…

November 13, 2019Leave a comment

...is that it implies there is something "wrong" with you in the first place. I've had a shift in perspective recently when it comes to self help, mental illness and shadow work. It's not something that always made sense to me, that truly bringing about positive change starts with radical acceptance of where we are … Continue reading The Problem With “Getting Better”…

Thoughts On…The First Week Without Therapy

November 6, 2019Leave a comment

I was going to publish a post today that I wrote earlier about the concept of "getting better" and how that can be problematic in itself; but it doesn't feel true to how I feel right now. I don't feel like I have any supposed "truth bombs" I can drop and feel self-satisfied about right … Continue reading Thoughts On…The First Week Without Therapy

Another Ending

October 30, 2019October 30, 2019Leave a comment

I'm not going to have everything wrapped up with a neat little bow for you. Because first of all, I don't even know what to say. You're able to articulate everything you're feeling and bring it into the room. I smile to acknowledge your experience, then go through my routine of looking at the cracks … Continue reading Another Ending

A Dreamless Codeine Sleep

October 27, 20191 Comment

I watched a brilliant film last night called "Call Me By Your Name" about a seventeen-year-old boy and a man in his twenties who fall in love over the course of a summer. It's one of the most beautiful love stories I've ever seen. It captures the headiness, the intoxication, the tenderness, the pain, the … Continue reading A Dreamless Codeine Sleep

I Wanted To Share With You

October 2, 2019October 2, 20193 Comments

I wanted to share with you. I had a list, in fact, of topics and prompts which would set this room aglow with pure connection. We would talk about boundaries and how well I'm setting and maintaining them, we'd talk about anger and grief and how well I'm navigating and managing them, we'd talk about … Continue reading I Wanted To Share With You

“Why Are You Single?”: The Bizarre Idealisation of Relationships

August 14, 20193 Comments

Being in a relationship is something of a security blanket for many people. Like an "at least I'm not alone" sort of thing. The presence of a significant other can absolutely add value to our lives and provide a form of support through adversity; but it's simply irrational to regard anyone in a relationship as … Continue reading “Why Are You Single?”: The Bizarre Idealisation of Relationships

On Feeling Unwanted

August 7, 20192 Comments

So this has been the main complex rearing its head for me over the past few weeks. Something happens, I experience emotional overwhelm and when I drill right down into it - I feel unwanted. Disposed of. Refused. Rejected. It doesn't matter if it's to do with the timeframe in which someone has or hasn't … Continue reading On Feeling Unwanted

An Honest Talk About Attention + Validation

June 12, 20198 Comments

An unexpected insight came up in a therapy session a few weeks back. I was talking about the attention that naturally comes with performing and showcasing my essence and vulnerability on a stage. People take notice, approach you to talk about your set - buy you a drink, even. Mostly guys. I said to my … Continue reading An Honest Talk About Attention + Validation

🌫Power Roles + Loneliness🌫

May 8, 2019May 8, 20192 Comments

The idea of power roles came up in my counselling session today. I was talking about the ongoing difficulty of maintaining boundaries in the relationship with my Dad. For those who have read quite a few of my blog posts (thank you!), you might be aware of the situation with my Dad; but for those … Continue reading 🌫Power Roles + Loneliness🌫

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